Everette Fortner's Blog

I was watching a movie, The Proposal, last weekend—it was entertaining enough, certainly not one that will make my top 50 list.  But mid-movie, the leading actor delivered a line that really struck me:  “the only thing you really own is your story, make it a good one.”  I’m not ready to philosophize on my life and my story yet, but as I work with so many young MBA students, I began to think about how that quote applies in two ways:  one, you have a story to tell right now that will determine if you get that job you are gunning for; and two, you are at a moment in your life to significantly shape your story—make it a good one.

Your story in the networking/interviewing/job candidacy process is, in my opinion, the difference between breaking through, or not.  If you have a compelling story, the entire interview hangs together and compels the interviewer to see the “fit” between you and the opportunity.  This week I was working with a second-year Darden student—she had a successful internship which resulted in an offer and she is a Second-Year Career Coach (a select group of students chosen to “coach” first-year students in the job search process).  As a coach, she has received positive feedback from students on her ability to help them with their stories, yet this week she came to see me because she didn’t feel her story was as compelling as it should be.  I admire her introspection and willingness to both be a coach and be coached.  One of my true passions is helping students develop this skill (see my blog on Daniel Pink’s chapter on “Story Telling” in his book, A Whole New Mind, or go to the source).   What I believe we uncovered in our discussion about her story was the need for her to be direct and upfront about how what she has done in the past weaves together nicely to perfectly prepare her to interview for this job at this time.  While she was communicating her transferable skills and the brief history of her accomplishments, she was missing the compelling, believable story.  In the process of our 45 minutes together, I think she got much closer.  At least, I was convinced.

What makes a story compelling?  It really is hard to put a finger on it.  It’s certainly not a history lesson in what you have done.  It’s also not a recitation of skills that you know the job requires.  A good story is not groveling and just saying what the interviewer wants to hear.  The trouble with these three approaches is that anyone’s story could be the same as yours.  Instead, a good story is uniquely yours—it celebrates your accomplishments, highlights your skills, and yet demonstrates your vulnerabilities and moral fiber.  The hero in the story is YOU.  It shows what you have discovered about yourself and where those discoveries are leading you.  It begs more detail and questions.  It sets up the remainder of the interview.  It creates a bond from the beginning of the interview.  The story is what makes you, you.

Now to my second point:  your career will be punctuated with a few seminal events.  Choosing to attend Darden is certainly one of them.  You had a story up to this point, and many of you want to make a significant change in your story at this point in your life.  You had dreams and hopes when you applied to business school.  Are you still pursuing those dreams, or bigger ones?  I encourage you to let go of the herd mentality of MBA students—go after what you are dreaming about.  I’ve met with students in the past few months who want to make significant career changes into passions not normally pursued by MBAs.  Are you still chasing those dreams?  Equally importantly, do you have a compelling story of why that dream makes sense both for you and for the target of your dreams?  If not, keep working at it.  It’s those that have a dream that develop and deliver the most compelling stories.  Those trying to fake it usually have trouble making it believable.

So, your story…in the end it’s the only thing you really own.  Make it a good one.

This past week I think I may have stumbled onto another key to success in the job search (and in life).  Have you ever met with someone and, after the meeting, you felt like a million bucks?  Do you find that some people are always accepting and affirming--they build you up whenever you are together.  This week my Darden travels took me to Atlanta, Boston and New York City for admissions receptions and visits with companies.  Though I met easily 100 new people, and visited with 20+ prior acquaintances, and even saw at least five good friends, three of the meetings stand out well ahead of the others.  These three people don't know each other, and are nothing alike in most ways, yet they all three make me feel the same way:  accepted and affirmed.

The first person is an old friend, one I've known since my time at Darden.  He is exceptionally smart and successful, running or investing in multiple businesses, leading hundreds of employees or constituents.  When I come to Atlanta, about twice a year, he makes time to see me--generally molding to my schedule and putting my needs first.  We usually, as was this case this time, can only squeeze in about an hour of time to talk.  Yet, when I leave my visit with him, I feel great.  He lauds me on my job, encourages me on my endeavors, listens when I talk, relays stories that relate to my needs, and digs deeply into my personal life.  We pick up like we have never been separated.  I don’t have many close male friends, yet it’s as if we have been friends forever.  When he asks me questions, he asks deep personal questions.  When he talks with me, he tells me what’s really happening in his life, with what he is struggling, and why he is feeling the way he is feeling.  When he left, I felt accepted and affirmed.

The second person is a new friend, a colleague from my current job.  We see each other once or twice per year and correspond infrequently.  We met this week to share ideas about our field, compare notes about programs, and commiserate on the bad economy.   She too has the ability to really focus on a person.  She never checked her Blackberry.  She lost track of time during our visit.  She took extra time to give me a tour.  She held back nothing, though her program is probably the best in the industry and she’s probably the best in her field.  She relayed a professional struggle that she is dealing with—which has turned into a personal breakthrough.  I learned from her experience.  As I look back, she let me do most of the talking.  Yet, when I left, I felt affirmed and accepted.

Finally, the third person who left me feeling the same way as the other two is a person I met for the first time this week.  I met her at a admissions reception in Boston—she’s a prospective student.  Of course, she’s in the position of perhaps feeling the need to “suck up” given she’s trying to get into Darden, but I didn’t feel that way at all.  We probably had three short chats throughout the evening—five to ten minutes each.  During each encounter, she exhibited an unusual energy and a genuine interest in the person with whom she was talking.  She asked probing questions, and she had done her homework on those she would encounter during the evening.  While her experience (current job) was good, it was her personal magnetism and personal presence that make believe she’ll be a great fit for Darden.  More than that, she comes across as someone I’ll want to see become a fellow alum.  After our meeting, I (and others) felt accepted and affirmed.

Now let me relate this to your job search.  When I talk to recruiters about characteristics that they seek from new employees, I always get a great list of things like problem solving skills, analytical skills, team work, leadership, creativity, etc.  But most students have these skills.  The acid test is something like “someone I wouldn’t mind being stuck in an airport with.”  Most MBA jobs require many, many hours of work per week, and we all want to work with someone with whom we enjoy. 

These three folks are ones with whom I wouldn’t mind being stuck in an airport.  Not just because they are interesting and fun, but when I am with them, I feel like a better person.  I actually want to be a better person when I’m around them.

(By the way, I’m sure there exists good literature about this subject.  I just started a terrific book that discusses a related topic—Powered by Feel, by James Clawson (Darden professor and good friend) and Doug Newburg.  Jim and Doug explore the question, “How do you want to feel?”  While I haven’t quite worked completely through the answer, I believe for me, and for many others, accepted and affirmed might come up (though, according to Clawson’s work, these emotions might reflect “outside in” thinking. (Clawson and Newburg, p. 28.)  Perhaps the subject of a subsequent blog.)

Based on my observation of this week’s travels and my encounters with these three different individuals, I offer these thoughts on building these types of connections in your brief encounters and interviews with potential employers:

·        Ask about them, and listen to the answers.

·        Know them as best you can before you meet them, so that you can get personal more quickly.

·        Affirm the person and the conversation:  this is the hardest, because faking it is easy to spot.

·        Don’t be afraid to get personal, opening up and revealing yourself to them. 

By the way, those who can’t do, blog.  I blog what I struggle, yet aspire, to do.

Yesterday I was inspired by two Darden second-year MBA students.  One of the two has recently turned down a job offer with a typical MBA hiring company to stay in the job hunt and pursue his passion, technology.  My conservative reaction:  are you crazy?  In this market?  With no US passport?  The other student is his wife, also a MBA student, with no job offer either.  I was inspired for two reasons:  one, these two students are willing to take career and financial risks to pursue their passions; two, they have a thoughtful plan and are executing that plan to be successful.  I believe we can learn from these two students.

One of our recent speakers at Darden’s Leadership Speaker Series used a quote that really struck me:  the quote was something like, “If you don’t take a risk, then you may never reach your full potential.”  This resonated with me, as I reflected on my own career and thought about our students at the beginning of their career.

This year I’m twenty-five years into my business career.  I’ve taken a couple of large, life-changing risks and innumerable small ones.  I’ve also “chickened” our on a couple of risks that could have been life altering and maybe career enhancing.  In 1998 I sought and accepted a senior marketing role in Singapore.  My wife, Sally and kids (ages 10, 7, and 5) moved to Singapore for nearly two years.  Many advised me that an international assignment was career limited—I’d be lost and lose “pace” with my peers.  What the move actually did was change the career game for me, caused me to think more deeply about my career aspirations, and provided enormous personal growth.

Six years ago I took another substantial career risk by leaving corporate America and pursuing a passion in educational leadership, marketing a brand for which I had passion and a deep sense of gratitude.  While I thought the move was risky, I felt it was a risk worth taking.  In the words frequently used by Dean Bob Bruner when speaking about Darden’s future:  for me, standing still was not an option.  (Perhaps more details should be the subject of a future blog.)  I’ve not looked back for the past six years.  I’ve grown and developed: it would be hard to find a job I love more.

On the flip side:  at one pivotal point in my career, I turned down an offer from a Fortune 50 multi-national company because I thought it was too risky.  The job was for a company I considered not in the top tier of “marketing” companies and would have required another relocation (my eighth, but who was counting).  Within a year the person that was hired was promoted to president of the division.  It could have been me.  Or could it?  I’ll never know.  I was afraid to take the risk.  Maybe right, maybe wrong.

A few principles I have learned when experiencing career risks:

·         Career risks early in one’s career leave more time for recovery from a bad mistake;

·         Career risks must be balanced with and taken in context of personal (familial) needs and personal risks;

·         Career risks in pursuit of a passion leave little room for regret;

·         Career risks should be taken only when a thorough action plan has been created to minimize the risks;

·         Nearly all career risks provide opportunity for growth;

·         Standing still in not an option—not taking the occasional career risk is in itself a career risk.

The reason the two students mentioned at the beginning of this blog are taking such a risk is that they have to:  they have to bet on a market that may or may not develop.  Technology companies don’t generally define their hiring needs until spring.  Yet, the on-Gounds recruiting machine will come and go by then.  In addition most technology companies are 3000 miles away and require personal investment of time and money to build the relationships necessary.  What excites me about these students is their detailed action plans for managing this risk.  They are not waiting until the spring, but are investing now in building the network to be successful.

So, to the two students with whom I met this week:  thanks for reminding me personally that career risks lead to substantial rewards.  More importantly, thanks for reminding me how I should be counseling new MBA student risk takers.  I’m sure I’ve said it before (Breakthrough Career Development Advice, Mariah Carey’s Career Advice on American Idol, Bee Movie Guide to Career Development—Part 1), but it’s worth saying it again:

·         Pursue your passion.  Now is the easiest time in your career to take a risk.  Don’t follow the MBA sheep unless they are pursuing your passion.

·         Be patient.  You may have to wait until spring.  You may have to wait until five years after graduation. (Yesterday, I ran into a 2004 alumnae who went through three jobs since graduation before landing a few months ago in the job she really wanted at graduation.)

·         Own it.  Don’t blame Darden for not being strong in your area of passion.  Don’t blame the recruiting calendar for presenting some opportunities before others.  Don’t sit back and wait for it to come to you (or to pass you by).

·         Let me (or others in your life) help you along the way.

I frequently meet with students who are seeking feedback:  feedback on career aspirations and plans, marketing materials and stories about their career transitions.  I struggle sometimes with just how much feedback they desire.  As many of them leave my office, I often wonder:  should I have been tougher?

A student this week suggested that yes, I (as a surrogate for Darden Career Consultants in general) should be tougher. The student's rationale: he had just met with an outside consultant, Karen Solorow, President of Coaching for Success, and she had provided more direct and tougher advice that he had received from Darden’s own.  I asked Karen why she was so tough.  Her answer: this generation of students needs it right between the eyes; kind but direct.  My interpretation:  having received positive reinforcement feedback since the preschool 6th-place trophy in soccer, this generation is shocked with less than positive feedback and therefore has a bit of trouble hearing it.

You may be thinking that "tougher" is obvious.  Why wouldn’t you be tougher?  For those of you with children, why aren’t you tougher on them?

I think we aren’t tougher because of the risks, and I believe my biggest risk is disenfranchising students.  Students come to business school with a clear set of expectation for their careers, and to hear in the first few months that their aspirations are unattainable risks alienating them.  I believe it is important for students’ placement success that they stay engaged with me (or their Career Consultant), so I don't want to scare them off.  So, my answer to students (or those receiving feedback):  assume positive intent. 

Another risk is the personal one – most of us like to be liked.  We (I) fear rejection.  In delivering constructive feedback I always worry that the negative feedback will be misconstrued as a judgment of the person and their character.  In turn, the person will reject not my feedback, but me.  My answer to this one:  get over it Bubba--it's not about me, it's about helping the other person.

Challenging, constructive feedback is as difficult to deliver as it is to receive, and sometimes not so useful. Unless a person is prepared for it, feedback may fall on deaf ears.  Finally when giving feedback, many of us (I) have a fear of being wrong-or in more psycho-babbly terms, have a fear of being found out as an imposter.  We question our own advice because we are not quite sure we are qualified to give it.  My counter to myself:   bologna!  I offer an opinion based on six years of career management experience and twenty years of business experience, so I should have the confidence that my experience (not advice, a subtle difference) will be valuable to the students.

Based on this one student's experience with Karen, and my own experience this week, my worry is somewhat misconstrued.  I recently received unsolicited, construction (read, negative) feedback, and I (1) am not disenfranchised; (2) still like the person; and (3) found it useful, even though the deliverer was not expert on the subject.

Here’s what happened to me.  I am on a very important task force at Darden with several senior academic faculty members.  I enjoy being on the team, working side-by-side with talented, brilliant scholars trying to solve problems of gargantuan proportions.  After over six months with the team I have recently felt a bit alienated and underappreciated. (Here’s where I could justify my behavior, but that defeats the purpose.) So rather than be constructive and open with the team about my feelings, I shut down a bit.  The team leader took the opportunity to pull me aside and call me out on my behavior – not that I was being quiet, but that I was showing obvious frustration to the point of belligerence.  Ouch.  But he was a master of delivering.  He reinforced positive behavior, re-iterated why I was chosen to be on the team in the first place, and encouraged me to lead the group, not follow.  Right away I recognized my behavior and began to change immediately.  My erosion of confidence in his leadership reversed – I recognized once again why he was chosen in the first place.  And I truly liked and respected him for his courage to speak up.

Never too old to keep learning.  I hate feedback, yet I crave it daily.  Certainly this is not the only time I’ve received feedback that I found useful.  As I reflect, tough feedback has been part of several significant growth times in my life.

So, I’ve gotten way too personal here.  This is supposed to be about you.  Here’s a head’s up:  I’m going to be tougher.  It’s what I get paid the big bucks for.  But when I’m tougher, remember I deliver with positive intent – not to disenfranchise, but to motivate.  It’s not about your person, it’s about your approach to job search.  And it comes from me based on my experience, my lens, my point of view.  It may be wrong, but it’s how I see it.

Mark Addicks, Chief Marketing Officer at General Mills, spoke as part of the Darden Leadership Speaker Series this week.  Okay, I admit bias, as I am a marketer:  he was great.  His leadership message (and marketing advice) was simple, yet inspirational:

Start with the end in mind.

Be different.

Be authentic.

Be empathetic.

Be provocative.

Be there.

He showed samples of great marketing following these principles—from both General Mills and other companies.  He inspired me and the students.  Thanks Mark.

He also made me think a bit more clearly about something I was in the process of blogging on this week and actually inspired me into the ending. 

Given the time of year and the place in the recruiting cycle, I have been spending a great deal of time with students on their personal story and strategies for managing their personal brand.   I enjoy helping students figure out their brand and discussing strategies to manage and market it.  Personally, though, I’m having a brand crisis:  you see, when I was born, my two-year old sister couldn’t say little brother, so she (affectionately?) called me little Bubba.  It stuck.  For the past 4$%^& years, anyone who knows me OUTSIDE the professional world knows me as Bubba.  Once a Bubba, always a Bubba. 

However, I became Everette professionally when I graduated from Darden.  Why?  My resume of course said Everette at the top, and my first interviewer, and subsequent boss, thought Everette more professional (and given I was working in NY, less Southern) than Bubba, so Everette I became.  Besides, it was my Dad’s middle name, and I am proud to sport it.

But, two personal brands are not recommended.  For many years, living in big cities like New York, I could keep my two worlds (personal and professional) apart.  But then when I moved to Charlottesville, I (like George on Seinfeld) saw my two worlds begin to collide.  An example:  recently, I was out bike riding, had a flat tire, and (thank goodness we’re in Charlottesville), some good Samaritan stopped to help me.  Clearly a personal situation.  I introduced myself as Bubba, but within a few minutes of conversation, realized that this Samaritan was connected to my professional network.  Hence, a mid-stream switch to Everette.  Given the size of Charlottesville, these two worlds collide frequently.  Another example:  my Facebook persona.  I exist on Facebook because I find it useful to connect with students and alumni of Darden.  Hence, Everette.  Yet, many of my high school friends have discovered Everette and think Everette resembles their high school classmate Bubba.  Not to mention Sally, my wife, who 25 years ago, said “I Sally, take thee, Bubba.”  Everette was nowhere in the picture.  Such confusion.

During Mark’s presentation, something hit me:  I like being Everette and Bubba.  Everette’s a pretty cool name—professional, staid, yet approachable, lends itself to its own set of affectionate nicknames (Ev, E, Big E), and carries on a great family legacy.  Bubba—likes to have fun, good friend to have, boy next door.  Both work for me.  I thought earlier in my career that I might just force Everette into more situations—let Everette be my dominant world.  But you know what:  as I grow older (ouch), I think Bubba fits.  I think it’s authentic.  So I’m going to be a Bubba and an Everette.

So the lesson for all you Giffs, Buckys, Jimbos, Cookies, Billys, Treys, Woodys, Chrissys, KatieBeths, Jacks and Tines:   be authentic.  Stick with whatever fits you.  Don’t let a well-intentioned boss somewhere along the way talk you out of your name.  And don’t let a childhood nickname haunt you if you don’t like it and it doesn’t fit.  Just abandon it at any key transition point and don’t look back.  Be authentic.

Signed:  Everette Bubba Fortner

Get your mind out of the gutter.  It’s InterviewStream, and how apropos after blogging last week on “Play More.”  So I have a suggestion (actually an assignment for those in my marketing class):  go play on InterviewStream. 

InterviewStream is a web-based service that records you via webcam while you respond to a couple of interview questions from the program.  You then can watch and try again and again until you get the answer the way you want.  My favorite feature is a counter on screen for you to count all your “like”, “ya know” and other fillers.  Then, you send the link to a friend or Career Consultant who can view your answers and give you feedback via the program.*

Our Career Center has recommended InterviewStream the last couple of years.  And according to our Google Analytics, few have availed themselves of the pleasure.  I asked in a second-year class last week how many students have tried it.  One student raised his hand. I asked if he could tell the class what he thought (one lesson a teacher should always heed:  never ask a question to which you don’t know the answer).  He said something very close to:  “It was the most awkward, unpleasant thing I’ve done for my career search…but, it was extremely helpful.”  Whew!  That was close.

Last week, my emerging favorite second-year student followed my advice and answered two questions for me on InterviewStream before meeting with me.  Yes, it was awkward, she said, but incredibly helpful.  She re-worked her answers until she felt better about them, then sent it to me.  Before I met with her, I spent about 10 minutes reviewing the answers (which were about 3 minutes of actual video).  I gave her feedback to think about via email before our meeting that afternoon.  She came to the meeting, and we once again viewed the answers, pausing to emphasize areas of strength or concern.

What an incredibly efficient and effective use of time and technology!  And it was fun to use as a reviewing device.  I felt like I was playing.  I felt like a kid again.  Okay, so I get carried away.  I lost track of time as I was so focused on how could I help this student get this answer to communicate what she hoped it would.  I was in the zone.  Flow, I think they call it.
Try playing more, this week using InterviewStream.

*Students can use the system in the Library video room (room 182 on the main floor) and in CDC Interview Room 11 (Instructions and a tutorial are available in both rooms). Students may also sign out a loaner webcam for overnight use. Students with their own webcams can use InterviewStream. More information about InterviewStream can be found on the CDC portal.

Move to India and you can join a laughter club—“small groups of people who come together early each morning at parks, village greens, and shopping centers to spend a half hour laughing.”  (Pink)  - begins Daniel Pink’s chapter “Play” from A Whole New Mind.  This phenomenon was started by Madan Kataria with the mission:  “to trigger an international laughter epidemic that he says can improve our health, increase our profits, and maybe even bring world peace.” (Pink)    And let me add:  improve your career success and your job search.

Pink sets up the concept this way:

But his popularity around the world, and especially the gradual acceptance of laughter clubs in offices and boardrooms, reveals another important dimension of the Conceptual Age—a move away from sober seriousness as a measure of ability and the elevation of the next essential high-concept, high-touch aptitude:  Play.
For more background on Pink’s book, the first four senses (Design, Story, Symphony and Empathy), and a discussion of the Conceptual Age, see my previous postings (Tell Your Story; Design Sensibility Is the Answer to Your Next Career Question; Breakthrough Career Advice (No, really this time!) ) or go straight to the source:   www.danpink.com .   

Is Play, as a concept, embedded in corporate America yet?  Yes.  Have you flown Southwest Airlines and been subjected to one of the flight attendants turned comic?  Did you know that the US Army developed a training “game,” that if commercialized, would have sold $600 million in sales?  Have you done the Lego exercise in First Year Operations yet?   Did you know that, according to research done by Fabio Sala and published in the Harvard Business Review, the most effective managers deployed humor twice as often than middle-of-the-pack managers.

Why is play (and the associated concepts of humor and joyfulness) making its way into the boardroom?  Pink says:  “Humor embodies many of the right (brain) hemisphere’s most powerful attributes—the ability to place situations in context, to glimpse the big picture, and to combine differing perspectives into new alignments.”  Kataria explains:  “Laughter can play a major role in reducing stress in the workplace…(and that businesses believe that) serious people are more responsible.  That’s not true.  That’s yesterday’s news.  Laughing people are more creative people.  They are more productive people.  People who laugh together can work together.”

Therein lies one of the key career connections:  people (interviewers) want to work with (hire) people that they enjoy being around.  Think of consultants who have to travel Monday through Thursday with each other:  one of the most important hiring criterions is how much you like the candidate. 

A second career connection:  your body language completely changes in an interview when you smile.  I worked with a Second Year student this week, whom I believe is on her way to a highly successful (though full of hard work) job search this year.  When we were working together, I suggested she smile more.  She did, and proved my point that revealing your personality with just a smile can make you a more attractive candidate to an interviewer. 

Third:  laughing in an interview reduces your stress and causes you to get more comfortable.  This in turn allows you to open up more.

Fourth:  an ability (and willingness) to interject humor demonstrates confidence and professional presence.  These two competencies are extremely difficult to assess in an interview, yet a robust sense of humor clearly demonstrates both.

Last:  when consultants conduct case interviews, they want to see both sides of your brain at work.  Not just the structured, analytical side, but the free-flowing creative side.  Laugh, and get that part of the brain working.  Bring toys, and use those to make a point. 

One of the highlights in my first class on the sometimes emotionally-wrought subject of self assessment with Darden First Year students this year, a wonderful Chinese student relayed to the class that in order to prepare for Darden, she googled “how to be funny in America.”  The class exploded in laughter at the thought.  Yet, she clearly understood the importance of humor.  And the laughter increased the intimacy of the class.  The discussion continued at an even deeper level.

A little bit more about play:  as a brand manager at General Foods in the late 80s (wow, that makes me sound old), my assistant brand manager and I were assigned to manage into oblivion the declining but highly profitable brand Shake ‘n Bake Coating Mix.  Our division had a large promotion going with the NFL, so we always had an NFL football in our offices as a tchotchke.  For weeks we stood 25 feet apart in the hallway throwing the football back and forth, brainstorming how to fix Shake ‘n Bake.  People laughed and complained.  People joined us occasionally.  We even broke the overhead light (I swear it was Andy).  But, we used our hallway antics as a way to lighten the load on the group and brainstorm new ideas.  We kept the group engaged, and the brand turned around. 

Play as a career strategy?  How about poker night for a club event with an investment bank?  How about using Sponsors Executive Residence Center’s game space to have game night as a career event with Second Years and First Years sharing their leads and contacts?  How about inviting your career consultant to go for a run?  I’m down for that.

Play more.